thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Randomize
