butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
