we're blogging at a bar
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
