Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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