All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
