do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
27 Parents Confess Shocking Secrets Their Kids Don’t Know
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.