Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Randomize