Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize