Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Randomize
