Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
