Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Im part way to drunk.
Randomize
