I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
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