just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
P.S. I can't hear my feet
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize