Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
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