But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize
