I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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