I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
