Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
