if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
