come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Randomize