I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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