STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
Randomize