worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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