Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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