He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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