but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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