maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
