So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Be still, my beating vagina.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
