no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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