I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
