I just saw a hot homeless man
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
