fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Randomize
