i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
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