his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
someone owes me an orgasm
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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