how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize
