It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
