You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
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