Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Randomize
