but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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