question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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