Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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