summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
