I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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