Just fell off a train. Bad.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
