I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
