drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Randomize
