I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
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