he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize