Dual....:-)
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
They should really pass out barf bags in church
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
