No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
