I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Randomize
